By Leslie Cairns
(Twitter: @starbucksgirly)
—Family Trees—
My last name
Is a cairn–
Yet, I am
Nowhere to be
Found. Slick, rocks
To help hikers
Find their way
Down ravines, stumbling.
& in my name
There’s a hollow.
Holidays are spent
Going to bargain
Stores, dollar trees,
Instead of real
Leaves. I fold
Green dollars into palms,
Instead of finding
Real leaves.
My therapist says
To make my own
Gifts.
I purchase bones
For my pets,
Let them open
Gifts, as if animals
Want to devour
Wrappings of words,
Books, markings, traditions,
The way I do.
My last name
Is a cairn,
No one believes
Me, yet I do.
A tree fell
On me, pine.
The doctor said
We were fine.
Near death experience
Turned into wind.
Luckily, I’m believed, for
It fell twice:
On a friend,
As well. Her back
Hurt for days.
My mind concussed.
I use that
Moment the roots
Upended, to travel
To the doctor.
Gives me an excuse
To ask her
These words long gone,
The meanings behind them,
The roots, the prefixes,
The vowels which
Hold them. Please,
My name means Cairn.
I am lost.
Tell me what
These words say, again:
Please redefine them.
Family, mother, living-
Loss, forgotten, estranged.
The last one
I know, I think
It means a tree
Untangling from Earth,
To fall on top
Of me. She smiles.
The doctor she
Indulges me, takes
Out a dusty
Dictionary, and paints
The words into
My spinning brain.
You’ll be okay,
She says, smiling.
To feel pain
Is to behold.
She makes me place
Grey Rocks in stacks,
To prove her
right,
showing
I can do it.
-Leslie Cairns
About the Author:
Leslie Cairns holds an MA degree in English Rhetoric.
She lives in Denver, Colorado. She has upcoming poetry/flash fiction/short stories in various magazines, including Coffeezinemag and Pink Plastic House, amongst others.
Recent publications: 'Almost Like a Hermit Crab' (Spoonie Press), 'The Sunlight's Going Bad' (Healthline Zine).
She was a Honorable Mention in Exposition Review's Flash Fiction Competition (2022) for her work, titled 'The Moths are Caught There'.
You can follow Leslie's Twitter at @starbucksgirly.
Comentários